Not For All My Little Words
by Sheena Is A Punk Rocker
Summary: And I could make you rue the day... but I could never make you stay." Beatrice does some reflecting after the masked ball.


"Beatrice! Count Olaf is-" He shouted.

She scarcely heard the rest of his message, which was- "Trying to kill you"- for all she could think about was that it was _him_.

"Lemony," She said and slowly turned around.

He was dressed as a bullfighter and before she had a chance to say anything else on the matter, he glanced over his shoulder and said, "I have to go. They're after me." He turned his head towards her one last time and said, "Promise me you'll stay safe."

Now she could see them. The guards- dressed up as scorpions.

He was gazing at her intently. "Promise me, Beatrice! Promise me you'll stay safe. Make sure the kids are safe too."

She nodded mutely.

"Say it out loud," he insisted with one last glance over his shoulder. The guards were approaching faster than expected.

"I promise, Lemony," she vowed solemnly.

And then he was gone, disappearing into the crowd as quickly as he had come.

And now she sat here on her bed with a piece of yellowed paper clenched in her hand and tears running down her face.

She hadn't wanted to leave him fifteen years ago. She hadn't believed the rumors circulating that he had committed those crimes. Her Lemony was much too gentle and sweet for that. He hated fire and was never one of the volunteers actually putting them out. He was a researcher. The best researcher in the whole organization.

It had been Jerome, really, who convinced her to break up with him. "It's much too dangerous, Bea. He's wanted by the authorities."

It was true, she knew. Later that year, Lemony had disappeared off the face of the planet and she never got to track him down and tell him how sorry she was.

She realized now why Jerome had done it. He had always been jealous of the shy, awkward writer because Lemony was with her. The day after she had sent him the letter stating that could never marry him (it wasn't until later that Jerome had admitted to sending the book that broke Lemony's heart); the carrier crows had brought her this. The paper clenched in her hand was a song Lemony had written for her.

It wasn't a happy, sappy, poem like he usually wrote for her. It has a bitter edge to it. He'd even written out the sheet music because he knew she couldn't resist playing anything on piano if it was written out. Now it was imprinted in her memory forever.

She smoothed out the paper and hummed the opening melody.

_You are a splendid butterfly _

_It is your wings that make you beautiful _

_And I could make you fly away_

_But I could never make you stay_

_You said you were in love with me_

_Both of us know that that's impossible _

'Oh if only you knew how much I still love you', she thought. She had never stopped loving him. She married Bertrand after hearing the news that Lemony was dead. A little part of her died that day, but she managed to move on.

_And I could make you rue the day _

_But I could never make you stay_

If she closed her eyes, she could hear him singing in his deep baritone voice. She could remember the days when they would curl up together on the couch in her bedroom and she would be lulled to sleep by him humming in her ear while listening to his steady heartbeat.

_Not for all the tea in China _

_Not if I could sing like a bird _

_Not for all North Carolina _

_Not for all my little words_

_Not if I could write for you the sweetest song you ever heard_

_It doesn't matter what I do _

_Not for all my little words _

It _had_ always been about the little things with him. He was the only man in the organization that didn't shower her with gifts at every opportunity. Lemony didn't try to show her his wealth, despite the fortune he and his siblings had inherited. All of his gifts were heartfelt and meaningful. To Beatrice, a simple, _I love you_, was more meaningful than anything in the world.

_Now that you've made me want to die _

_You tell me that you're unboyfriendable_

Despite the sadness of the song, she couldn't help but giggle just a little when she read that word. He often did that with his poetry; when he couldn't find the right word, he made up his own.

The song was blurred in quite a few spots due to age and the fact that her tears fell on the page so often. The last two lines were especially difficult to read, but she knew them by heart by now and she sang them to herself quietly:

_And I could make you pay and pay_

_But I could never make you stay..._

"I wish I stayed, Lemony. I really did," she muttered to herself.

* * *

**A/N**: Wow… this is the shortest thing I think I've ever written! And one of the fastest things I've written too. Well, I'm currently attempting to write quite a few ASOUE fics right now but I'm suffering horrible writers block. This was just an idea that popped into my head last night at 2 AM while listening to The Magnetic Fields. Now, normally, I hate songfics for this fandom just because I don't really think they… work for it. Can't really say why. But I'm in _love_ with this song and I think it fits because Daniel Handler played accordian on the album this song is on. He's not actually on this song… but the songs he _does _playon just didn't exactly fit this. Anyhoo, song is called, "All My Little Words" by The Magnetic Fields and it's absolutely amazing!!! My drum teacher got to see them play and Lemony Snicket went up on stage and played with them! =] If you wanna hear your favorite author playing the accordian, check out the Magnetic Fields album, _69 Love Songs_. Well, review!

Also, in case your wondering about the whole Jerome thing... well, am I the only one who noticed that he was just a bit obsessed with Beatrice in The Ersatz Elevator?

**Disclaimer**: Daniel Handler owns characters. Stephen Merritt of The Magnetic Fields owns the song. I, unfortunately, only own four books in the series… =[


End file.
